Wednesday 5 September 2012

What's next?



I am always busy planning and working towards my next goal.

A uni degree, a promotion, a house, an adventure, a new job, a wedding, a honeymoon.

It’s what I do. I plan and I move and I work towards something.

Recently it dawned on me that I've got nothing big to plan for. I've got the job I wanted that requires me to stay put for the next 2-3 years, I've got the unit that we love and that for financial and lifestyle reasons we will probably live in for the next 2-3 years, I've got the husband and we've just exhausted our funds on travel and a wedding.

All the 'big' milestones - house, new job, children, big travel - they're all a few years off and I have nothing to keep me busy planning.

I know for some people this might sound wonderful but for someone who has spent her entire adult life planning and consuming herself with 'what's next', I feel pretty lost.

I am not accustomed to stopping. Pausing for reflection. I don't know how to just be. My instincts are all shouting for action, for change, for something.

But for all sorts of reasons, I am here and I can't run away, or move and I don't want to waste the next three years planning for what comes next.

What's next has to be what's now and to be perfectly honest, I’m not sure where to start.  

(Image via shotgun-season )   
 

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